how to ask out a female cashier

That said I think that the fact that you know it could be awkward speaks well of you, OP. Hmm Im on the fence here. Thanks for sharing your positive experience! Enough folks in customer-service positions have testified on that thread that they get unwanted solicitations so often that even if you are the nice person who means really well, you might still be a REALLY annoying straw on that camels back. They would try to dazzle me with charm, I would kindly redirect them to dazzle me with good work. She went to Spain on vacation, bought a bunch of cheese, and casually mentioned it to him one day, saying, It might be fun for you to come over and try some of it with me.. Learn more about Stack Overflow the company, and our products. So, for me, Id play it extra-super-cautious and wait for the big neon sign and the person to ask me. That's what "creepy" means. Most importantly, if you see that she doesn't want to engage in a conversation with you, do not insist. The point to all of that is, it is possible to hit on/ask a retail worker out without being creepy. He told me that he had a girlfriend but they were on the rocks currently. Where I live now, in Central European rural areas that latter point is the predominant norm. Canadian of Polish descent travel to Poland with Canadian passport. Aaaaaand now my friend is no longer a regular at that brunch place. How does this answer the OP's question about how to ask a cashier out for a date? Citation please Im genuinely interested in this, Studies have actually found that men are just as capable as women at understanding nonverbal communication/soft nos. This way, both of you can learn more about each other while also discovering new places at the same time; an enjoyable experience for everyone involved! Lets have coffee when you get off work seems to be the go-to line. Additionally, it can be helpful to practice what you want to say beforehand. But I didnt love YOU. No! Its like, Im working. Theres a lot of baggage (no pun intended) with singling out Women For Special Protection. We looked into each others' eyes for about two weeks. Thats a pointas the OP is gauging this guys interest, she should observe how he acts with other customers. a very attractive girl working at The cashier's problem is that she's stuck behind her cash register. So I had the chance to get to know him a little bit, he got to know me a little bit, we established a rapport, etc. Try going into the store when it's not as busy. If he doesnt call/text then he isnt interested and you can leave it at that. By engaging the person in a discussion, you can explore their biases and try to clear up any possible misunderstandings. Please dont do this! On top of all the other overlapping chances of something else being in the way. How to get to know a service staff without interrupting her work? I think people sometimes forget that retail employees are supposed to act like this, but then, a lot of people assume that if a woman is smiling at you, shes obviously interested in you, so. Browse other questions tagged, Start here for a quick overview of the site, Detailed answers to any questions you might have, Discuss the workings and policies of this site. LOL did you really think one person could eat that much corn?. For fun and entertainment? Try to see this from her point of view. It may be true, but I strongly suspect its not, and its a consequence of anecdotal data, how a creepy experience is much more memorable than a dull normal day at work, and so on. She thought he was attractive and they got on well. Don't make it awkward. Met a girl, we liked each other but now shes ignoring me and i want her back. They can't just go around giving in to anyone, they have to be picky. the supervisors were involved to pass the information from him to her. And then you never, ever speak of it again. Cheesy romance story. We met for coffee, later for a meal, and while we never became a couple, we did end up being best friends and we still are to this day. (Explaining this because some people look at me funny when I talk about going to the drive-thru). Who do I talk to about putting something on the store's bulletin board? I think theres a power differential between the customer and the employee that youre missing here. It can be intimidating to ask someone out, especially if you dont feel confident in your own skin. Ive always thought of it more as, Hey, youre someone that seems to be intereseting, and Id like to get to know you better. (Actually, kind of like a job interview in a lot of ways, haha. He was confused she asked, Did you really think one person could eat that much corn?. I think people should recognize the difference between hitting on someone (e.g. Like youre causing major pain to someone by giving them your #. I remember the last time we were shopping at an REI a lady cashier (Im guessing who also assists with the wall-climbing area) was talking to a guy (I think who also works at the wall-climbing area too). Does the order of validations and MAC with clear text matter? Thanks msbadbar, I loved your story, especially about your dad! We talk every day and meet a few times a week. And all kinds of stuff in-between. The OP only seemed receptive to posts encouraging her to do it though. When lindy hopping, it is important to use positive body language and express excitement and enthusiasm. There would seem to be a paradox, in that lowering the cost of rejection for her increases your chances of success, but there really isn't a paradox. If you dont call well forget this ever happened.. Were not talking about sexual harassment, for heavens sake, its coffee (or actually, better causal ideas downstream). Toastmasters chapter. I put the money in her hand, and then she gave change back. One way to do this is by reminding yourself that you have a lot to offer and that there is no reason why the other person would not be interested in getting to know you better. I've been wanting to ask out a cashier, how do I avoid making her Give her an easy way out. So if it were me, Id just say, Hey, would you want to grab coffee sometime? If they say no outright, or if they say things that imply that theyre not so interested (I dont know, my schedules kind of crazy etc. Think of it this way: can you think of someone you think is genuinely rather awful? Im hoping, for the employees sake, it didnt. They get stared at & aggressively flirted with on a regular basis. What does it mean when the girl changes her number after bre My ex gf stood me up. You should try it sometime. so if said gentleman wishes to run into you outside of work he would have a pretty good idea of how to do so. It feels like a lose-lose situation. This shouldn't stop you from being nice to the cashier, or the post/tax office girl. Now if in chatting it comes up that you and your friends frequent X location on Saturday nights because you love live music etc, and they show up there to say hello or you happen to run into them elsewhere, its more of a grey area thats more arguably okay. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Versus waitstaff who are being grossly hit on by customers know if they go stop talking to me like that, they just cost themselves the tip. OP here, Im female and not crazy :). Im in the dont do it camp because if he says no, youll both feel awkward. She said yes, and since it was 5PM we shared a glance of understanding for a few seconds. @Kidburla From France. (Helpful hint: if hell only text and wont talk on the phone, that is often a sign that he has an SO of some kind). To subscribe to this RSS feed, copy and paste this URL into your RSS reader. After they reject you, accept their rejection graciously. If I didnt know them outside of the customer-employee interaction, theres no way in hell Id go to a private address. Plenty of wise advice already. 3. Yeptrue creeps are spreading it around as much as they can. That's borderline stalking. can we talk about GOOD companies for a change? She again said no. Conversation will help break the ice and show your interest. Make sure you speak clearly. Dont drop compliments and hit on her, asking how her day is isn't found by making her uncomfortable. 1. When she did, the man then ran behind her and hit her in the back of the head with a closed fist, seriously injuring her. :( I think people are going a little overboard with the sexual objectification and harassment-type comments. That was hilarious. That's just basic humanity. I worked in restaurants for years and later on in customer service and sales. And youre right. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. Thats a lot different from walking into a store and asking someone whos rung you up at the cash register three or four times to go to dinner with you. If she's interested, she'll follow it unless unable. This will make things even more uncomfortable/annoying for the employee and might even cause her to face a reprimand at work if her employer doesn't fully understand what happened. A new cashier joined my local food shop. Because its *just* flirting? OP, I did this once. So sorry to say, for me at least, the perceived romantic connections were not real. And as others have mentioned, it's very easy to misinterpret her general customer service skill as "signals" of something else which she didn't intend. In this case, the crush could have ignored it. This is also a longshot. If you think hes interested, write your phone/text number down and as youre leaving, talk with him a bit, smile, give your number to him and say if you ever want to talk outside of work, call me or text me then leave. Finally, she asked him out. I date women. Here are some tips on how to ask a cashier out: Take the time to start a conversation. Even if you think this guy might really like you, youre going to have to take it slow. Im gonna join the dont do it! train. Can I just work in peace without having to hide from horny men? Theres also the fact that we dont know the OPs gender, and we dont know if this is opposite sex flirtation. Asking nicely doesnt erase that. Theres a lot of faux-socializing in retail thats meant to put the customer at ease and convey a general politeness expected in dealing with human beings (Hi, how are you today?). Im in the school of thought that the fact OP is concerned about how it will be received probably means shes fine to move forward. I must be old fashioned too, how in the heck are people supposed to meet these days if you dont want to do so at bars or online? Or, to put it more pithily, as this linked post full of citations says in its title, Mythcommunication: Its Not That They Dont Understand, They Just Dont Like The Answer I dont what it is about retailperhaps the forced friendliness-but it just seems like everyone thinks were dying for dates and I would get asked out constantly. In Ohio, we have drive-thrus where you can literally drive through and buy beer, cigarettes, pop, etc. I've just met a guy, he may be the one! To an extent, we cant help it. I do not understand why being asked on a date (or simply learning that someone is attracted to you) is apparently now widely considered a traumatizing experience to be protected against at all times. But this objection, that there is no other way to meet people besides asking them out when they are WORKING, is pretty silly. Dont drop compliments and hit on her, asking how her day is doing is all you should do. I hated being asked out when I worked retail because it was awkward and there was never anywhere I could escape to after I said no. A: Be direct and sincere when asking the cashier out. Ok but how do I do this without coming off as a creeper? I never watch the show. This could be almost anything, but here are some examples: This should be something you actually enjoy, so be sure to let your excitement about your hobby be apparent when you mention it. By doing this, you will actually get more insight regarding whether she likes you or she is just being polite. Too bad The IT Crowd is off the air, I could totally see them doing a show like this one. It is not out of the realm of possibility that someone might make a complaint, factual or otherwise, about a retail worker who turned him/her down. I came here to drink milk and kick ass. I have never asked an employee out or hit on a woman working before, and for some reason I think this woman is special, even though I dont know intimate details about her life and vice versa. Hey, would you like to grab coffee sometime?). As the others have pointed out, you have got a bit of a captive audience and that needs to be respected. However, with a bit of forethought and confidence, you can make it happen in no If youre a regular, you can talk to her casually until she gets used to seeing you. The degrees of freedom available to signify attraction are few. But then even if she says yeah I have to find a way to get her my number quickly. This is bad enough in public, but its a bit worse if youre being put in that situation at work. Dont ask out the waitress, or other person providing you customer service in order to survive. Its how our brains are wired up. Casual, heres my number, and then leave it. I met my husband in a bar; I met my previous boyfriend at our mutual workplace. A: Rejection can be tough, but its important to accept it gracefully. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! Personally I think the heres my number if you would like to talk when you are not at work approach sounds okay, although I totally understand the problem here. But ultimately, I cant change who I am nor should I. And it was always a minefield to navigate. You really have to go with your gut, I think. Hes always nice and professional, but makes sure that his suitor knows that he has a serious girlfriend. I dont know if I get hit on very often, Probably not since most of the male customers are either 5 years younger then me or at least 15 years older then me. Assuming you have written your number in that note, she will text/call you if she is interested, otherwise you should not try to do anything more. This x a million. When I was a cashier, someone gave me their phone number. +1000 I work in customer service, it is so awkward to get asked out at work. Privacy Policy. But its not an ideal world and sexual entitlement doesnt always come in obvious, high pressure, sexually explicit packages. Show interest and respect, compliment the cashier, and then invite them out. My friend Ilene always talked to the cheese manager at her grocery store. I was able to give my friend additional details and she said that the employee sounds nervous and that I should just give him a note, and that in fact, a customer of her own has been leaving notes for awhile and they are now dating. truealso as a guy he would probably feel less threatened if the attention was unwanted. (Im female, btw, and the employee in question is male. I wanted to ask her out or leave a note but last couple times I get super nervous when I'm about to do it. I mean, she's a cute cashier, she probably gets hit on on the regular. Cookie Notice However, I would go about this very, very carefully and only do it if you are more than reasonably sure that he feels the same way. I definitely agree with all of the suggestions about keeping casual and low-key and, if he turns you down, continuing to interact with him as though nothing happened. Make me a good burrito, and you will always have a platonic place in my heart. My dear Internet god, those posters on Craigslist are pathetic. Thanks gsa, Im actually not really comfortable asking someone out, and then there is the whole customer/employee dynamic, but it sounds like Im going to have to be the one to make a move so thanks for the reinforcement! If a Flirt more. There's a strong bias against guys bothering random girls in shops with requests for dates (speaking from experience). I dont really care how kind you are or subtle about itits still off-putting. I once asked a girl to explain what she meant, when what she actually wanted to say would have been perfectly clear if we had been in a bar. Connect and share knowledge within a single location that is structured and easy to search. If I were single and shopping and met an individual Id like to ask out I would have. So I definitely dont think its fair to allege that Im not empathetic here Im reflecting on my own feelings as well as those Ive heard from others of both genders, or as you say, putting myself in their shoes.. When I saw your name The IT Crowd was the first thing I thought of! How to flirt with a cashier - GirlsAskGuys Well, the tricky thing about asking out someone in a customer service position is that their job requires them to be nice to you. At restaurants this happened a lot and I was never offended and it was only slightly awkward for a moment and a simple I have a boyfriend always worked as a no whether I had one or not. You can't pressure a woman into being attracted to you. Some points of potential special cases. Whoa, is Missed Connections still a thing? listen to him, and definitely good to go for a free mean with a guy that's not a creeper!! As several others already have replied - it depends where you are and the (as yet) unknown chemistry between you and the cashier. It doesnt matter anyway, because it will never ever happen again. You might get the label 'creep' and you might find that your shopping experience will drop dramatically. but to me, Id take being asked out as a form of flattery, even if I wasnt interested This crap makes me want to flip tables. Let them know why they caught your eye and why spending time together would be fun. Theres nothing wrong with letting someone know youre interested as long as it is no-pressure, you dont treat them differently afterward, and you are OK with being shot down. Don't think a girl is attracted to you because she's doing her job. Thats a great idea. Ask WebTalk about what you're going to make with your items. Well, hes not at all flirtacious and if he were I doubt that Id take him seriously. This is so uncomfortable to me. Q: What should I do if the cashier rejects my invitation? Asking for help, clarification, or responding to other answers. The player must time their shot accurately, mix in the right, To get the Man Catcher in Castle Crashers, purchase the Arcane Expansion Pack (DLC) from the Xbox Marketplace. My brother-in-law met the woman hes about to propose to when he was an employee at a grocery store and she was a customer. I like some of the advice above with the whole, Im thinking of doing this, maybe you should come join if youre free, and bonus if its with a group. It was somewhat flattering with compliments but also uncomfortable if they couldnt accept my response. Its possible that he is burning with desire for you but would get in serious trouble if he asked you out on a date. How To Get Dares Of Eternity Lightning Round. When I worked in retail, I probably would have been flattered if someone hit on me but I was a teen boy. It's her job to be nice to you, don't mistake this for her giving hints that she's interested in you. But if he were really, really interested in the girl, might he not go to those places hoping to run into her? I went to the same drive-thru for YEARS and had a crush on the guy who worked there. But we can't comment more on that without knowing some specifics. Now I tend to err on the side of it is their job to be nice and their job is shitty enough without you slipping them your number so short of them jumping in my lap I just let it go. There there from Radiohead rings a bell. I waited tables for a very long time. This is extra worse when youre a captive audience who cant get away from them at work, and its why a lot of us would recommend not asking at all or proceeding with extreme caution. Im going to respectfully disagree. My band's playing at the Speakeasy this Thursday, and I wanted to let you know about it. Speaking of which, if someone at workcustomer or coworkerasks you out, and you dont want to go, EFFING SAY SO. (Not that youre Lisa, OP, just that its a humorous musical way of showing how two folks interpreted the same interaction!). You could try to get friendly with one of his coworkers to find out if hes single, and possibly also when his break is or when he gets off work. Its great to know that youd be flattered (even if not interested)! Al Haitham Genshin is an accomplished actor, producer, and media personality from India. Do your own research to find contact information; dont rely on the phone number printed on the check. So I wouldnt just give a blanket no as advice. But its so much more likely that any given service worker is being nice to you because their continued employment and paycheck is dependent on being nice to you. This seems like a bit of an overreaction to someone stating their opinion in a non-rude or abrasive manner. I always wanted to date him and ask him out, but I never got the courage until a few years ago when I found out we were both single. If the null hypothesis is never really true, is there a point to using a statistical test without a priori power analysis? Your a cashier right? Asking me point-blank if Id like to go on a date with you is going to make me feel really uncomfortable. Ask about the cashiers day or tell them about something happening in the store. So I met this girl who is a cashier at a local store and shes really cute.

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how to ask out a female cashier

how to ask out a female cashier